For shits and giggles...

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Or , "Thinks found in the trees after the tornado."

 

An unexpected, but a good find to be sure.

 

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Another one with an ego problem.

 

Must be in Canada. I would get a ticket here in NY. Truck balls were banned here.

 

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A penguin is driving across the desert in the middle of the summer. Although he has the air conditioner on as cold as it will go, he is still (understandably) miserable. He is, after all, a penguin.

As he cruises along, the motor gives a sputter and a lurch, and the A.C. goes out. Now it's unbearably hot. With his breath coming in gasps and sweat running into his eyes, he manages to maneuver the vehicle off the next ramp and pulls into a mechanic shop. After briefly explaining his situation, the mechanic agrees to take a look and see if he can address the problem. He tells the penguin that he is welcome to wait in the lobby.

The penguin nods, waddles to a seat, but still can't manage to get comfortable. The weak fan in the lobby just isn't cooling him off enough. He looks around desperately. There! He spies an ice cream shop through the window, just down the street. “This should do the trick” the penguin thinks to himself.

He races down the road, through the door, and up to the counter of the ice cream shop. Orders a triple scooped bowl of vanilla. Sits down at the table, staring lustfully at the giant bowl placed before him.

Now, being a penguin and all, he can't quite grasp how to use the spoon. Desperate to get some much needed relief, he ends up just shoveling as much of the frozen treat as he can into his mouth with his flippers. And he makes a MESS. Vanilla ice cream spatters cover him from head to toe. His feathers mat together with the sticky liquid. But… it works! He's feeling much better!

He promptly waddles back to his car. The mechanic meets him as he rounds the corner. The penguin glances at his car, then back to the mechanic, then raises his eyebrows quizzically.

The mechanic takes a quick glance at the disheveled bird and quickly averts his gaze to his clipboard. “Well,” he says, “looks like you just blew a seal.”

The penguin looks up, clearly alarmed. “No, no, NO,” he says, “you've got me all wrong! It's just ice cream, I swear!”

 

That's a good one to remember. Too bad senility is .......

 

First came the self driving car. Next BIG thing is self flying jetliner. Or would that be a DRONE-liner?

 

What ever happened to a HALO jump?

 

Don't know about the drone liner but that was a gr0ner.

 

HeHeHe.

 

I would rather say "ALL TITS MATTER".